25 posts tagged “susan”
Oh my I am weeks behind in updating. I kind of feel like parts of my life are being failed. My apartment is a disaster area. My email commitments have gone to hell. I don't eat properly... okay I have never done that but still. For a while in January I was getting my shit together and now I am worse than ever. I am making a promise right now to post a Vox at least twice a week. Even if nothing new is happening. I can post how nothing ever strikes me as noteworthy. Oh! See? Now that is a lie. Things are noteworthy, I just always feel silly for what is of note to me. So on with this.
Last week City of Glass came out and I devoured it. Hard to believe The Mortal Instruments is over. I loved COG. There were a few places that I almost threw the book and I did scream at it some. The first half with all the Simon stuff when it was my last Jace book, annoyed. I felt so bad for Jace through out though. He more so than Clary. He's my favorite character of the three books. But I am having a hard time not writing anything that would spoil D who hasn't read it yet. I think that after he does I may have to write a play by play, chapter by chapter synopsis. For now it's a new tattoo I can't scratch.
So I have ebeen the world's worst BSG fan. I don't know what is up with me. I watched two eps and then got really stubborn. But no more. I have a plan. Nielle will be here visiting next month and we are watching all 10 eps. We can watch them 2 at a time and still have time for the Ren Faire and Salton Sea or San Juan Capistrano. I am making lots of plans for when she is here. I would take the car and drive her to some of the places alone.... but I can't handle the stress of driving anymore. Especially not in LA. So we will be stuck to the whim of D. Oh and I have to take her to Scoops for vegan ice cream for the win!
As for what I've been doing in game... well I'm a 69. Just a few tens of thousands away from lvl 70. Then all the good stuff starts. We are finishing up Nagrand... we are 2 or 3 quests away from the achievement. We have been playing a lot still with Terun/Deathtoou. We did Ring of Blood as primarily a 3 man. We needed help with the final boss and with Durn: the Hungerer. I'm always pretty amazed by what the three of us can do together. I've been having some disagreements with G since T and I started Tali. He really resents the fact that we didn't stay with him and I get it. It was a betrayal but I wouldn't have been happy in Ring of Fire. I don't know how to get that across. I have been spending a lot of time talking to Thelyon and I wish, wish, wish I could convince him to come to Tali. I don't want to pressure him but he's the kind of people I want to surround myslef with. But hey he could feel about Tali the way I feel about RoF and Warlords. Who knows. I've also been spending a lot of time with Sylianya. She is so cool. We spent the first morning killing big babies and walking to Lakeshire. The second morning we went to Exodar. And Tali... I mentioned it above but it's been a while since I last updated my Vox and I definitely never mentioned that T and I started our own guild. T and ali = Tali. It's small but growing. I hope it grows to be a very successful guild. Low key but fun.
I love this...
Today was a really busy day. We had to get me shoes for D's work Christmas party and I chose shoes that I don't believe I will wear that often over the ones I loved. I really regret getting them. The other ones were even on sale. I love shoes but why do they have to be such a labour when choosing them? Then we had to go to the comic book store and now we are up to date on Spike, Buffy and Angel. Our next mission is to actually read them. We are about five issues behind on Angel. Appalling. Then we went to Petco and got a friend for Nate. I haven't named him yet because I'm leaning towards either Jace or Seth, after Jace Wayland from The Mortal Instruments or Seth from Wicked Lovely and I would be heartbroken if I had to say either of them had died. So for now my little black moor goldfish is Little Fish. Then we went grocery shopping which was an ordeal because I was there. It had to be twice as expensive because I like to shop off the shopping list. It's like I'm the bane of D's life at times. I did get pickles, silk nog and raspberry sherbet. Score! Then we had to go to the boss's Christmas party. I was not excited about it because I have the social graces of a rock. He did have a nice house and the fresh pineapple was yummy. I even had a glass of bubbly and reminded myself that I find champagne god awful. We came home and made french toast with cinnabon bread. D's a master chef and it was so good. Oh and in between the grocery store and the party I wrapped D's Christmas gifts and I love Christmas. I keep wanting to talk to him about them and that would just be bad. I'm so excited for Christmas when he will open them and hopefully like them. I know three things that he will love. The rest is all up to the gods.
Tomorrow I'm meeting Team Logan at Mo's in Burbank at lunch. Tam will be there and I haven't seen her since last Christmas. I'll get to show Belle my new silver nail polish. She will love it. I hope to make plans with Susan and Belle to get lunch or dinner this week sometime. I don't see the group, well hardly ever. It'll be good to touch bases.
I have to sleep sometime soon. I am not tired. It's 3:30 in the morning. My sleep is a mess. Stupid red eye. I haven't been the same since. I doubt sitting here listening to music and updating my last.fm helps.
I've had this problem for a while. I can't seem to write out what is going on inside. I don't know, maybe to me it means I'd make it real if I committed it to writing. I don't think I really understand it. I described it today in therapy as it being akin to rape. Like I was violating myself to talk about these things anywhere outside of therapy. Which is all kind of bullshit, but it doesn't change how it feels. There are things going on.... I wish I could write them out. Maybe a good stream of conscious would clear the air. But at the moment I can't. Repressed and clueless. Everything has been pushed down to the point where I can't shake up the can for fear of colossal failure of all in the vessel. The thing that makes me sad is this journal used to be a safe place to feel things out. I feel so removed from that person I was and I don't think it's a good thing. I am more than movies, tv, music and books, but that is all I can write about. And to prove myself wrong I will turn the rest of this post into those shallow interests, because that is what life has become to me.
This past weekend I went to Susan's and had a sleepover with her and Belle. It was really nice because I got to have alone time with Belle on Saturday and that always means the world to me. If there is one person who gets the nuances and essence of what I feel it's her and touching base makes me feel less alone in the world. Susie got home in the evening and we all had to settle in to our weekend slumber party. We played Life and I of course had to take the term sleepover literally and I was basically asleep by 9:30. But no one was upset by that. The following morning I read until everyone woke up and then we rematched Life. It was a very chill weekend. And Susie is probably one of the sweetest people I know. I am really glad I got to work on my stupid jealousy. I like hanging out with both of them. I still sometimes feel like I am invading something but that is probably my own insecurities and not something they are putting off.
On Sunday I got a phone call from Kev. My boy is in Palm Springs with Janaki and his family and he wanted to know if we could meet up. I am over the freaking moon. I miss him and he's a little bit of home and I want to make it out to see him so it will be like I am touching familiat things again. And to meet Ja too. She has done so much for him. It almost seems like we should have met a million years ago. So D mentioned that maybe he could leave early on Friday and drive us down there. It would be neat too because he's really close to the Salton Sea and I've always wanted to see it. So we will se what happens.
The other big thing for this past weekend was that I picked up my contacts. I am going back to the eye doctor tomorrow with them because I am not seeing with them as well as maybe I should. I do like them and I am having few problems with the actual wearing of them. I have to say that the one problem that I am having that is unacceptable is that I am not seeing clearly to read. That one has to be ironed out. Tomorrow I'll talk to the eye doctor and we will go from there.
I got The Black Dagger Brotherhood; An Insider's Guide the other day and I have been pouring through it. I love it a hundred times more than the Dark-Hunter Companion. I am reading the dossiers right now. I've read Wrath's, Rhage's and Z's, I wish that there were something about the heroines in here but it is pretty testosterone centric. Not that I have a problem with the brotherhood. I did just read the part where she mentions her over all arc; Wrath, Rhage, Zsadist, Butch, Vishous, Phury, Rhevenge, Payne, John Michael and Tohrment. Very interesting. I wish they had introduced Payne early. I would have liked to have a feeling of her and V together. And I don't know if I can get behind a John Micheal story, I wonder if it will be him and Xhex.
I am so ass backwards and behind on reading. I have library books which I've already renewed once. A bunch of books which I have yet to read and then I bought some new romance novels the last few days, the newest Julia Quinn novel and the newest ones of Stephanie Laurens and Lisa Kleypas. As to what I'm reading now... The Insider's Guide, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Vampire Romance Anthology, Masquerade and I keep rereading parts of the Black Dagger books. I am all over and it's in a bad way.
I haven't had a chance to watch SYTYCDC from last week yet. I just finished downloading it like an hour ago. I am anxious to see how it rolls. Maybe D can put aside hockey for it for a little while tonight.
Oh and on the topic of new things. Tonight I'm going to the gym for the first time in months to work out on the bike. I'm not at all excited about it. But I'm going.
This weekend is going to be a separate weekend for D and I. D is going to the Scream Awards with Spike folks and I have hopes of going to a slumber party at Susan. A Team Logan Slumber party and it's been years since we had one of those. Well at least one that includes me. It should be fun for both of us.
Today was a really lazy day. I spent the afternoon watching hockey and then my men, Taylor Kitsch and Chace Crawford in the Covenant. I will not defend that movie to anyone. It's so bad it's good in my opinion and anything that gets Taylor Kitsch in small swim shorts gets my endorsement. D let me download the soundtrack too. I really like the scores. After watching the Covenant I had to watch last weeks and this weeks True Blood. I love Jason and Lafayette. They make the show for me. Although I have to admit that the show isn't really holding my attention like I wish it would. I'd rather watch the Covenant.
As we were leaving the Grove tonight we were following Nathan Fillion and he almost took D out in an attempt to say hi to someone. He didn't seem all that tall and I always thought he was a monster. He does read apparently because he was carrying a books. But the escalator wasn't good enough for him he took the deathbox.
Tomorrow is my birthday party at Susan's. I'm going to have a couple beers and play some games and hang out with friends. I might even leave my book at home. We will have to wait and see what happens.
After the five of us, Susan, Belle, D and Belle and Susan's friend April all went to 101 Coffee Shop. There we totally saw Ryan Gosling. And he was shaggy but yummy. I tried to get D to follow him into the men's room but my boy totally chickened out.
There have been a good many Twilight photos released the last few days. I am about done waiting for the movie. I think if it would just be Novemeber 21, maybe I would be well and truly over this silly fascination. Note I didn't mention rereading Twilight in the paragraph above. So it is all about the movie now. Maybe I'm growing up.
I've had the most painful Monday. My reading habit turned evil and consequence was scaring. I was reading a Night World ebook and I kept putting off leaving for therapy. I usually leave at 2pm and it was 3:15 before I started getting my stuff to leave. I forgot my phone. I dropped my keys on the bus and they rolled away. I was reading The Kitchen God's Wife and I missed my bus stop and got dropped off 2 miles away from where I needed to be. No phone to call D. The return bus stop was packed with students from the nearby school. So I walked it, as fast as I could because I was worried I'd be late. I passed every scary homeless person I could and that always makes me really uncomfortable. I finally made it to the office and I was positively exhausted. Lesson learned, don't be such a slave to my obsession or my ass will be stranded in Santa Monica.
A lot was shaken in the Sherrilyn Kenyon world yesterday. She announced the characters and synopsis for Dream Warrior due out in February. I'm totally confused because I thought that was to be Aimee and Fang's story. Who knows. She also announced the cover of the DH manga. I like the red one better but this is okay. It's probably more expressive of bad ass Kyrian. Then last night I got an email from St. Martin's with the excerpt from One Silent Night and I still have my reservations. I'm just not a Stryker fan. Although if it promises Urian then I it's almost a given that I will read it.
I just finished reading the Night World books. I maintain that Ash is my favorrite character with Morgead a close second. It makes me want to go back and read some parts of Jez and Morgead's story again. But the last three stories are way different than the first six. They are all millenium stories about the apocalypse. And to go from James and Poppy's story well it is like a whole different world. And Ash stops showing up after the sixth story too. They don't reference back to anyone other than Rashel and Quinn. The one thing that did get me was reading the summary of Strange Fate which will be the tenth book was that she says seven characters go off to fight the apocalypse and only two come back and that destroys me. There was no one I could say was annoying enough that they could die. Okay Maggie has something like death coming to her but I don't know if it's death. And she wouldn't be sent to fight. She would be home inciting the underdogs to revolt.
I picked up Poison Study by Maria V. Snyder from the library and I plan to start it today. Belle recommends it so I have pretty high hopes for it. I also have to get somewhere in The Kitchen God's Wife today because it's my 20 in 20. I should have picked Jekyl and Hyde. I would be done with it already. But I didn't so I have to suck it up. I think my real problem is this is out of the genre I'm used to reading and it just doesn't hold my attention like other books do. It's not bad, but it's not the elixir for what stirs me. I'm hoping Poison Study will be able to hold my attention.
There were a few interesting Twilight related photos out in the last few days. I like the Kristen Stewart and Rob Pattinson photostrip the most. I think Rob's face looks too angular in the new poster. There are a lot of articles coming out in the coming weeks and I guess that is to be expected with the movie release being about six weeks away. I kind of thought there would be a bigger push. It doesn't really seem to
This Wednesday is the So You Think You Can Dance show. I am excited but somehow nervous about it. I don't know what is bothering me about it exactly. I hope that Matt and Kourtni will be touring with them. And I want to see Gev and Courtny again. It should be fun. So what's my problem? I don't know. But after the show, Belle, Susan, their friend April, D and I will be going to the 101 for a really late dinner. So I'll have a double dose of the girls this week. Wait if we include my birthday party this weekend it will be a triple dose. They will be really sick of me by then. Heather will shoot herself in the head from me asking if she's read City of Bones a hundred times. It will be to the point where they will cancel on Monday for Friday.
I have spent the last few days reading L.J. Smith books. Starting with the Secret Circle books, which give me the title of this post. I'm very confused about these books because some parts are just plain silly but I think my small mind found it all compelling anyway. And I thought the end was way too pat but I reread it three or four times... what does that have to say? And I thought Cassie was really undeserving in the middle book, The Captive. Then I found ebooks of the rest of the Night World books so I've read Dark Angel, Chosen and Soulmate too. I still have three more of those to read and I'm so on the fence as to whether I will buy the Night World omnibuses. Although I do like being able to flip through pages which I can't do with an ebook. I also have her Forbidden Game books in ebook and two others. Sadly not her Dark Visions which I actually am pretty interested in. That came out wrong. I mean that as more so than the others.
On to other books, in my ebook frenzy the other night I found a bunch of Charles de Lint titles, Anne Bishop's Black Jewels, Dark Jewels and Tir Alainn, Christine Warren's The Others books, some Nicholas Sparks stuff, some Maggie Shayne and some Tamora Pierce. I don't think it was what I was looking for from Tamora Pierce but thems the breaks. I also bought a new book at Border's yesterday which was The Hunter's Moon by O. R. Melling which is a Chronicles of Faerie book. It looks really interesting if I can stand to read something that doesn't have a romantic edge to it. We will see. And D finally finished reading the Mortal Instruments books and he thinks I'm ridiculous. (spoilers upcoming) He says there is no way that she would write a love story through the first two books that would end in the second before the story is over. And he things that there is a twist coming up that will exonerate Clary and Jace. I hope that that's true. He also said that he considers the three main characters to be Jace, Clary and Valentine which I guess is true but I hadn't thought of it like that before. And his reasons were Clary for what's obvious, Jace because there is no shadowhunter world for Clary without him. And Valentine because he's the glue that binds Jace and Clary's story. And I am not talking about the love story as that came as a result of them finding each other. The world and the binding were already there. *Sigh* It's such a good story and I am going to read it again this week now that D is done. But before that I will finish the Night World stories and my 20 in 20 book, The Kitchen God's Wife by Amy Tan.
Yesterday was D's birthday, he turned 27, and a bunch of us went to play putt putt at the Putting Edge near Marina del Rey. It was a scary place, all in black light with glow in the dark paint and neon balls. We even got bracelets to signify that we were playing golf. It was an unusual experience at that. Of course we got to be in front of someone rude and I snapped and cussed the guy out and threw a ball at his kids head. It was seriously not my best moment and I have been having major regret pangs ever since. I still wish the whole family death but I wish I could have done it cooly and calmly. I think I ruined it for Susie and that really bothers me. After that we all went out to eat at Lares. It was Aaron, Mario and Yanna, Paul and Amanda, Susie, Belle, D and me. We had a nice time and I even had two pieces of quesadilla for D. Of course I explained to him that that was a special birthday thing and no more solid foods from now on. The service wasn't the best at Lares though and I don't know if we will go back again anytime soon. Well maybe D will go there for lunch but not me and him. It was good seeing Aaron and Mario though. I talked to both about seeing them more often. It sounds as if we will maybe do a couple weekend visits down the 405.
Tomorrow is Monday again and I will have therapy. I atleast have this weekends birthday thing to show that I'm socializing. Oh and D talked to Erin about going to Fairbanks for Thanksgiving. I am very excited about that. So I will be able to talk about that and my upcoming visit to see Dr. Scott on Wednesday. I can also tell her that I will be out with friends this Wednesday night when we go to the So You Think You Can Dance tour and the Friday out with the girls. I'm doing better. I'm in a much better place this week than I was in last week.
Today is a auspicious day for no real reason. Just a feeling. I woke up too early and have that feeling in the pit of my stomach, which has nothing to do with hunger. Just unsettled. I feel like Elena, writing that something bad was going to happen today. I feel like something, good or bad may happen and that either way, I won't be ready for it. I just need to distract myself and think of other things... kittens, Jace or the ocean. A botanical garden with a myriad of color. Speaking of which the picture to the left. On Sunday Susan, Belle, D and I went to the Getty Center and we walked in the gardens. It was really nice. I like doing things with the girls. I already have plans to go to the 101 Coffee Shop with them on Friday. And on Saturday D will have his birthday thing. I don't know yet who all will be there but I think it will be nice. It will fulfill the demands that I socialize. I think I am most excited for D to open his birthday gifts. I hope he likes what I got him.
Last night I read Glass Houses by Rachel Caine and I really liked it, although it has a chaotic quality unlike anything else I've read. And violent, oh yeah, is it violent. I am dying to read the rest of the Morganville Vampires books now. I asked D if we could go to the bookstore tonight so that I could pick them up. I've read all but one of the books that I bought on Friday as well as both of my library books. I still have a bunch of ebooks and all my Blaze books so I'm far from tapped, I would just really like to read the rest of these books while it's all in my mind to. This morning I read Blue Bloods by Melissa De La Cruz and I didn't really love her style. I will read the remainder of the Blue Blood books but unless there is some huge change I won't ever read them again. I didn't really like what she does to the main character and the love interest. It must be the week of reading dismal love stories. I am going to read a romance novel just so that I don't forget how a book is really suppose to end. I'm about done with not happy endings. That said, I am not done with Jace and Clary and I think I'm going to read the excerpt for City of Glass again so that I can have it memorized before the book comes out in 181 days. I do pray that I won't be so keyed up about things the entire time. This could be exhusting.
I'm feeling almost tempted to leave the apartment. Those sorts of thoughts scare me. Why would I want to leave the apartment? I don't know where these thoughts are coming from these days. There seems to be an overabundance of weird running through my mind. Maybe I need my meds adjusted again.
